The Top 10 Parenting List
Joey and Carla Link
October 10, 2018
If we were to ask you what your “Top 10” priorities in parenting are, what would they be? Would getting your kids to soccer be more important than getting them to read their Bible? Would you be satisfied for them to get their schoolwork done, or do you insist they get it done with a good attitude? Would cleaning their plates at mealtime be on the list or making sure they follow through on what you say? Think about it for a few minutes. What are the “Top 10” parenting priorities on your list? Your spouse’s?
Every parent is faced with a list of their top priorities every minute of every day because how you make the parenting decisions you are faced with each day is based on what these priorities are. It is possible, perhaps even probable that the priorities you would rattle off to us after a few moments of thought have nothing to do with what they in reality look like.
You also need to make sure that it is a goal of yours to work on these priorities instead of letting your children determine what they will be. So, as a quick evaluation, is the tail (your child) wagging the dog or is the dog (you) wagging the tail?
Can you list what your top 10 goals/priorities are for raising your kids? Take a few minutes and jot them down, then think about the following:
- How well are you reaching these goals versus compromising them?
- If you are compromising more than 10% your kids might be more in control than you think they are.
- How often do you allow “context” to interrupt your child’s day so that life often seems chaotic and out of control?
- At the end of the day, how often do you find you didn’t accomplish what you intended to in training your kids?
- When you say “no” to your child does he/she accept it with a good attitude even if it goes against want he/she wants to do?
See if you can get your spouse to tell you what his/her “Top 10” priorities in parenting would be, then merge both your lists into one, because you and your spouse should be working on the same page. Write down ways you can make the “Top 3” stay the “Top 3” by week’s end. Every night, review with your spouse how the two of you did on keeping the “Top 3” on top.
When keeping those 3 on top of the list (in reality) is no longer difficult, work on ways to keep the “Top 5” true priorities and so forth until you are working on your “Top 10”. This is the best way to stay focused on how you want to work on training your kids in Godly character instead of letting those good ideas slide into the big black hole of busyness.
Were you able to come up with your “Top 10” fairly easily? Was it difficult to merge your list with your spouse’s? Why do you think they were so different?
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