What’s Wrong With This Picture?
By Joey & Carla Link
- When you go shopping, do your kids move out of the way of other adults, small children, disabled and elderly people when going through a doorway or do they rush to get there first and don’t bother to hold the doors open for them?
- Do they speak to older people kindly at church, or do they ignore them?
- Do they speak kindly to other kids when playing or do they have to have their own way, especially when the kids are siblings or younger kids?
- Do they have an attitude when you ask them to do something?
- Do they stop saying “Yes Mom” when you call their name? While this may not seem like a big deal, did you give them the freedom to stop saying it?
- Do they say “please” and “thank you” without being prompted by you?
- Do they gladly share their things or is generosity a foreign concept to them?
- Do they treat you like a peer telling you what they are doing or do they ask you for permission first?
- Are they more focused on themselves or about the needs and wants of others?
- When playing games or sports do they play their way or go by the rules?
- Are they experts at controlling others with their roller-coaster emotions?
Mom and Dad need to have the same standard of what is right and wrong.
- Do you and your spouse agree on the standards you are raising your kids by?
- Are your standards Biblical and practical?
Parents must recognize when their kids are being self-focused and disrespectful.
- Do you see it?
- Are you open to your spouse or others showing you when your kids are violating your standards? Ask your friends to point a specific behavior out to you when your kids do it.
Parents need to have a plan other than lecturing and reminding when standards are violated.
- Most parents don’t have a plan on what to do so they react when their kids’ behavior is disrespectful to them and others instead of proactively dealing with it/them.
- With your spouse, choose 2-3 typical behavior violations and develop a plan for what you will do next time they come up.
Be willing to act no matter what the cost to you or your child’s reputation.
- Their life-long character is more important than their child/teen friends.
- Be willing to accept a little embarrassment and deal with your child. In the long run, others will appreciate and respect you for it.