What Your Kids Need to Know Before They Leave Home
Do You Love Me?
February 14, 2019
Joey & Carla Link
It opened on Broadway in 1964, winning 9 Tony awards before its run ended in 1972. In 1971, it was released as a musical comedy-drama movie, winning 3 Oscar awards. The movie was filled with songs with greatlines that had you humming the song all day long. Here are three of them. Can you guess the movie?
- “If I were a rich man daidle deedle daidledaidle daidle deedle daidle dumb”
- “Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match. Find me a find, catch me a catch.”
- “Do I love you? For twenty-five years, I’ve washed your clothes, cooked your meals, cleaned your house, given you children, milked the cow. After twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?”
It’s from the musical/movie “Fiddler on the Roof”. The setting of the story was in 1905 Russia and like most countries at that time, a father pledged his daughter in marriage to a man whether she agreed to it or not. But Tevye, the father in the story had a daughter who wanted to break this tradition and marry a man she loved. In this classic movie comes the question “What is love?”
As a parent when your child gets a crush on someone or wants to begin dating you are concerned, wondering if they know what they are doing. Is it puppy love or is it going to lead them into a dating relationship? Will you approve of this guy or girl? Will he/she be the best person for my child?
These Questions Often Go Through Parents’ Minds:
- Have I taught my kids what they need to know about love, dating and the ramifications of giving their heart away to the wrong person?
- Do they really know what love is?
- Do they even have a definition of love or is it just a warm feeling that they can’t describe or explain? Do they know the difference between love and attraction?
- Do they have right boundaries for dating so they won’t compromise their purity or other privacy areas that could cause them problems?
- Could this guy or girl break my child’s heart?
These questions and this process is why we created “Dating, Courting and Choosing A Mate WHAT WORKS?” A 2-part video teaching series and workbook by Joey & Carla Link taught before a live audience of teens and parents. It equips parents to prepare their kids for this normal change in life.
We’ve taken the most common questions we have heard over the years from parents and answered them with a unique plan for each teen to develop what is right for them according to their convictions approved by their parents. This plan can take away a lot of the worry and stress in the whole dating/courting process.
In this email series “What Your Kids Need to Know Before They Leave Home”, we know how to handle the whole dating process is definitely on the list of things to address. They need to develop a philosophy that is biblical that works for them and you. They need to set their emotional and physical boundaries so they don’t get hurt and so they don’t compromise what God intended for them, which could leave them in a bad marriage or a single parent.
In this video series we list the “4 Pings of Attraction”. Each “ping” addresses a level of attraction teens/young adults feel. The more “pings”, the greater the possibility your teen will be drawn into a relationship with this person.
Pings are Attractions.
► Ping 1: Physical attraction. A girl thinks a certain guy is cute and her heart goes “ping” when she sees him.
► Ping 2: Social attraction. He likes spending time with her, enjoying her sense of humor and intelligence.
► Ping 3: Emotional Attraction. She feels jealous when this guy pays attention to other girls. She gets possessive of his time.
► Ping 4: Spiritual Attraction. He is attracted to a girl’s spiritual maturity, her love for the Lord and how God is the center of her life.
Parents, how are you preparing your teens and young adults for the pings that go off in their head and heart? “Pings” begin in the later elementary years when your daughter’s friends say “He likes you, he likes you! Do you like him?” Valentine’s Day often becomes a starting point for kids to begin thinking about whether they have a crush on someone or not.
“Joey and Carla!
I just went through your teaching on “Dating, Courting & Choosing A Mate, WHAT WORKS”. Your teaching and approach is fantastic! This is a unique concept; Your Friendship Dating Model is such a logical, well thought out, one of a kind process that deserves attention from all Christ followers.”
-A Blessed Mom