Transforming Your Child


Transforming Your Child

Joey and Carla Link

September 18, 2019

I (Joey) was sitting with my grandson watching him transform his “Bee” from the movie “Bumblebee” into a car (Volkswagen bug). It took me back to when my own son played with transformers. I am still in awe how he could (and now my grandson) can remember the complicated maneuvers to manipulate the plastic parts without instructions and without breaking them.


It made me think, “Why can’t kids remember to obey their parents and follow the simple instructions they are given?” The answer is not complicated, it really is simple – it’s just not as much fun for them!


To encourage you – when you get frustrated with your kids for not obeying you or for not fulfilling their responsibilities, many times you are not dealing with disobedience as much as you are dealing with the distraction/temptation of what is more important to them.


What parents need to do is work on training your kids to focus more, pay attention to the instructions you give them and work with them to remember and do them completely.


King Saul had the same problem as your kids do in I Samuel 15. The prophet Samuel told Saul to listen to what God told him to do (15:1). God gave Saul clear instructions (15:3). As you read through the chapter you will see that Saul didn’t fully do what God gave him to do the way God told him to do it.


God had to send his prophet Samuel to deal with Saul’s disobedience. “The word of the Lord came to Samuel: ‘I regret that I have made Saul King, for he has turned back from following me and has not performed my commandments.’” (I Samuel 15:11


Saul patted himself on the back for a job well done by setting up a monument to himself and when he saw Samuel he told him he had “performed the commandments of the Lord.” (15:13) When an outraged Samuel told him he didn’t do it the way God told him to, Saul blamed his actions on the children of Israel. (15:21)


When Samuel told Saul that God was removing him as the king over Israel, Saul tried to apologize but even then once again blamed the children of Israel for making him do it. (15:24)


Sound familiar? Put the names of your kids in place of Saul’s. What happened to obeying “immediately, completely, without complaining (whining) and without challenging God’s authority by doing it his own way”? When your kids are 85% characterized by these 4 signs of obedience, they will become transformed into living their lives God’s way.


God gave Samuel a great verse to give to Saul that every parent should have their kids memorize: I Samuel 15:22-23


“Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices
    as much as in obeying the Lord?
To obey is better than sacrifice,
    and to heed is better than the fat of rams.
23For rebellion is like the sin of divination,
    and arrogance like the evil of idolatry.”

Insisting your kids obey you and fulfill their responsibilities is not just for your convenience, it’s so you know you can trustthem. If you can’t trust them to obey you or fulfill the responsibilities you give them, then how will you know others can trust them to follow through on what your kids say they will do?


But this is not even the biggest reason you should want your kids to obey you; it’s because as they mature and grow up your ultimate job is to transform your kids by teaching them how to transition their obedience from obeying you to obeying God their Heavenly Father. If they won’t obey you, then how will they learn to obey and follow the tough things God will ask them to do?


Teaching kids to obey you, their parents, is foundational for them to have a great relationship with you and with Jesus and to fulfill the purpose God gave them life for.


At our parenting conferences we give practical teaching to help parents get their kids to obey. We have also created good resources to help you understand what obedience is and how to get it from your kids. We hope you will take advantage of the resources mentioned below so your kids will be able to be characterized by Colossians 3:20



obey your parents in everything,

for this pleases the Lord.”