Beccy Jackson
May 8, 2024
During our 20 years of teaching the parenting class Growing Kids God’s Way, my husband and I always looked for ways to show our girls what God looked and felt like. It was our goal for the parents who took classes with us to have a glimpse of that too. The most powerful tool that we learned from this material was “first time obedience“. Teaching this to our children brought many blessings throughout our lives. It helped to make our home peaceful, less stressful, and more enjoyable plus it showed other family members and friends just what God’s love looks like in a powerful way. We show God that we love him when we are obedient and trustworthy to answer His call.
What does first-time obedience look like? In essence, first-time obedience is when a parent calls their child’s name, the child stops what he/she is doing and answers, “Yes mom/dad, I’m coming” and comes to you right away. They answer immediately, completely, without grumbling or arguing. The benefits to this one act of obedience are numerous. It gives your children/teens the training they need to stop what they are doing and listen to what you are saying. This is very helpful if your child needs to get away from a bad situation like a tense encounter with another child or adult. In these situations, it is very comforting to know that your children will respond immediately, completely and without arguing when you call them. You don’t get frustrated and exhausted with threatening and repeating calls to them because they won’t do what you say. You are able to trust your child to respond to you. Your child/teen knows what is expected of them so this relieves frustration in them too. This may sound easy but it takes a lot of time and lots of patience to teach your kids first time obedience, but the benefits far outweigh the time and effort it takes to teach them.
Teaching your child first-time obedience can be done throughout the day when everyone is calm and children are more accepting of instruction. Making a game of it is also a great way for children to learn how to respond.
My daughters were known for first-time obedience by my extended family members. It was part of who the Jackson’s are! Being one of eight children, I have a large extended family and our reunions are always chaotic with kids running around and lots of yelling back and forth between parents and children. My parents noticed how our kids obeyed us the first time that we spoke to them and they carried out what we told them to do completely without having a bad attitude. The end result was that friends and family enjoyed being with my family, and because our kids obeyed us by coming the first time we called their name, we enjoyed being with them too!
Setting your kids up for success is important because it builds confidence in them. Calling your child’s name when you know that he/she can hear you and therefore respond correctly helps him feel successful. When he feels successful, it reinforces the correct behavior and makes the behavior more appealing to the child.
“Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”
Colossians 3:20
Beccy Jackson and her husband Mark live in Murfreesboro, TN and have 2 adult daughters and 1 grandchild. Mark is a Nurse Anesthetist and Beccy is a labor and delivery nurse. When Beccy was teaching one of their daughters to look a friend in the eyes and say hello, her friend told her about a wonderful parenting curriculum, Growing Kids God’s Way and Mark and Beccy signed up for their first class soon after. They went on to be class leaders for more than 20 years. Beccy says the class changed their entire life by enhancing their marriage and parenting skills.
If you would like more information on taking the parenting class Growing Kids God’s Way, contact info@parentingmadepractical.com.
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